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Caught In The Rain

by Eve Gowen

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    Physical compact disc in high quality, matte cardboard case with one page booklet. Artwork by Eve. Inner artwork photos not included because it's a surprise.

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1.
Gullfoss 04:36
I’ve always liked having people to ignore being lonely doesn’t sit well in my stomach But I couldn’t be any further from home and I am alone and her company is enough What do you do when you’re too tired to run too cold to stay still? Stand in the wind again stifled yet fulfilled Behind the waterfalls we hear our thoughts so loudly spray the skin Clear thinking becomes easier when the air is thin And don’t you know that we are still young? And there’s still time to get lost in Gullfoss I always slept well there, placid dreams in steady streams Sleep thorn sends me to a peaceful place to a restful space Open up the window to a cold and windy world The fire on the mountains: make me feel alive Open up the window to a cold and windy world And the snakes in the sky fill the room with green light
2.
Worry Women 02:59
Know I’ve got a lazy conscience, tell my Worry Women all of my problems- the only people who will listen to my madness They’re equipped to deal with my pointless sadness And though they may speak critically about me behind my back At least there’s something to listen to when I can’t sleep and it’s pitch black Even if I had the energy to lift my heavy head I’m trying not to bite these hands that feed and offer me a bed Is it ironic that she even needed to buy them? She’d do the job herself if she ever had the time to Is it naïve of me to consistently confide in bits of yellow string? Telling secrets to people who can’t speak will keep them hidden But these one way conversations are getting pretty lonely Sometimes I feel like some advice but I’m getting blank stares only Is it ironic that she even needed to buy them? She’d do the job herself if she ever had the time to Maybe if I just gave her a chance But maybe it’s just too late for that
3.
My body clearly runs on caffeine cause I’ve been sleeping every five hours this week Can’t keep from being haunted by my dreams and getting mixed up with what’s reality Late for TAFE nearly every day, don’t think it’s for me anyway But I can’t bring myself to leave straight away And these bags under my eyes are clearly oversized, will have to pay another 25 to bring them home with me My stream of consciousness is drowning me I can see all the lucid faces looking down on me And I know I don’t belong in the stone building trying to create something of meaning And these bags under my eyes are clearly oversized, will have to pay another 25 to bring them home with me And the skin that I am in likes to keep me sleeping only one day I’m afraid I’ll believe what I’m dreaming And I will crash my car craning my neck tryna look at the sunset
4.
Isn't So Bad 03:32
I won’t pretend that I’m not sick of writing songs that are all the same But subject matter is hard to find when you see the world in grey And you always look at things through rose tinted glasses, always so happy to get caught in the rain And I hope that my colourlessness doesn’t bleed into your line of vision it’s a contagious condition Maybe one day I won’t feel so guilty for always being so sad Maybe one day I’ll finally realise the world isn’t so bad So I’ll write upbeat songs, pretend that I’m chipper Reassure myself that no one will listen to the words that I sing and the points that I bring up constantly about feeling lonely And there’s always spiders in the corners of these rooms, always teardrops in the corners of your eyes too I can’t keep a smile on my face unless I’m looking at the one on you And being wrapped up in arms isn’t so warm unless those loving arms around me are yours and I can’t help but panic that there’ll come a day when I’ll be hugging myself because you’ve gone away But at least for this moment I can put that aside and just keep on hugging you for a while and realize the world isn’t so bad
5.
Leeds 03:52
I’m not high, I’m just dead tired with sleepy eyes It’s been like this since I’ve been away and I’m trying to remember what I liked about you in the first place I listen to your songs just to hear your voice Cause you don’t want to call me anymore to be fair, that’s understandable And if I’m being honest I hope you find someone hot to get off with so maybe one us won’t be so lonely for the night Of course it’s now when you decide to write a song about me, when I’m struggling to justify why I had to leave Even if I’m feeling guilty it’s just bad timing and immaturity I’m not high but it’s getting harder to see behind the red in my left eye and the tears in my right And I’ve lost a grip on what your skin feels like and I’ve lost the smell of your hair in mine and I’m afraid something we used to have has died Because I can’t sleep with you on my mind I can’t talk to you all the time I can’t function without your company or you hand in mine And of course now you decide to write a song about me, when I’m struggling to justify why I had to leave Even if I’m feeling guilty it’s just bad timing and immaturity Of course it’s now when you decide you want to try again, when I’ve only just figured out how to be your friend And I don’t trust me with your feelings cause I make bad decisions when tired and lonely
6.
Stuck 03:08
Focus seems a simple notion But there’s no hope of my devotion To even the simplest of things no Coping with the visions that I think of Progress is senseless there’s just mess In this hollow hole of shadows and cold And all the memories, vague, that I hold Persistence folds, it’s a distant goal In an instant I’m falling behind And my satisfaction in my lack of action Of course is running low It’s in deficit To hell with it I’ll do none of this today Why is being productive and being constructive Necessarily the best way? You’re stuck on your own from no on ‘till who knows So get used to your company It’s a frame of mind yet to be refined to comfort your misery
7.
Pilots 03:47
My thoughts keep me company It’s silence that I’m searching for, it has escaped me Little white lights dance behind my eyes I watch them on this lengthy flight, something to watch to remind me that I am normal Soaked in inertia, jealous of her: the pilots see the sun every day Down here, we’re not so lucky so self-medicate away My lips are cold and I’m feeling older than I have ever done before Wrapped up in guilt, the secrets we spilt keep me outside your door Little white lights dance behind my eye I watch them on this lengthy flight, something to watch to remind me that I am normal And everyone takes something in the morning to make their lives more bearable Just because mine’s prescribed doesn’t make me any healthier
8.
Can’t help but notice that I write all my songs about you I know you used to always write about her You say that you’ve felt nothing for a year now Well, before I met you I didn’t know how to feel Don’t wanna say that I’m afraid that we’re deteriorating But how can I not worry about my favourite thing? You never seem to want to tell me anything at all, you’re the only person I trust with my thoughts But I can not make you, I just have to wait for you I can not make you, I just have to wait for you To love me too Can’t help but notice that you always seem so distant and I start to feel lonely even when I am with you You say to me that there is nothing that I can do but can’t you please understand I wanna help you But I can not make you, I just have to wait for you I can not make you, I just have to wait for you I only want the best for you and I only want to help you I only want the best for you why can’t I be the best for you?
9.
So your head tilts forward as your eyelids are growing heavy Lean into the weight that’s growing, growing steady The jolt of nightmares rip you from sleep Crisp water stretching shine across your dreams A cavern of secrets, all in my head Living my lovely lie alone in my bed It's time for me to run away it seems and start chasing sweet and savoury dreams I have seen her, you know I know that dress, Its fabric worn, it’s black and torn, you know she looks a mess It's faded in the sun with ease and the plunges It's riddled with holes like Swiss cheese and sponges A cavern of secrets, all in my head, living my lovely lie alone in my bed It's time for me to run away it seems, and start chasing sweet and savoury dreams It's hard to decipher, decide if this is fake It's winter with peaches, brown sugar, iced cake It's time for me to run away it seems, and start chasing sweet and savoury dreams
10.
It’s been a tough couple of weeks I’m waiting for you to get back so that I can get some sleep She always seems to make it worse but I can’t bring myself to tell her And I’m drowning here in all of my fears with clenched teeth that I can’t seem to free up And I know that things are gonna get better And I know that you’re there to help me One anxious mind raising another, Isn’t it curious that the voice in my head sounds just like you? One anxious mind drowning in thoughts that I know aren’t part of me but they know exactly what I’m thinking And don’t plant seeds of doubt in my mind cause they always grow up and they always grow wild And don’t plant seeds of guilt there instead cause there’s always so much swimming in my head And I know that things are gonna get better And I know that you’re there to help me Just say you’ll run away with me Just say you’ll run away

credits

released February 24, 2018

All songs written, performed and recorded by Eve Gowen.
Mixed and mastered by Jaxon Stickler.
Artwork by Eve Gowen.

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Eve Gowen Launceston, Australia

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